“Those who get offended easily should be offended more often”
Counter-cultural idea: Nobody can offend you, it’s your choice to be offended. When we get offended easily, it’s a sign that we’re either taking something personally or taking things too seriously.
I have to remind myself that when someone says something “offensive” to me or about me, it reveals more about them and their faults rather than myself.
A perfect example: check out the comments section on my original Facebook post. Someone who saw my video got offended by what I was saying and took it down a different rabbit hole.
He interpreted it as being complacent when there is an injustice happening (such as bigotry, racism, etc). This was definitely NOT the spirit or intention of the video.
In my observation, he was noticeably annoyed by the idea and was probably looking to start a fight and demonstrate his intellectual prowess and moral high ground. He also tagged his friend for backup, which seemed to be intended to try and “win” this argument.
While it would have been easy for me to take it personally and attack back, I rewatched my video and took my own advice. I understood where he was coming from, and even though he diverged from the spirit of the idea, I knew this wasn’t a battle I needed to try and “win”.
Instead, I chose to end the discussion with acceptance, empathy, and gratitude for him and his beliefs.
To be completely honest, when I first started reading the thread and the attacks, my heart rate increased as an involuntary “fight or flight” reaction took place in my mind/body. However, I took a second to listen, understand, and calmly formulate my best response.
And in retrospect, I thought it was ironic and hilarious that someone got offended by my video about not getting offended and how you control your own emotional response to things.
We should learn from those who can laugh at themselves easily and not take things personally. These people are almost always much happier.
Even for me, this is a work in progress. And this was such a beautifully-timed challenge for me to face and apply my own advice.
Let me know your thoughts! Do you agree? Disagree?
Originally posted on 7/26/18 on Facebook here.
Marlo Yonocruz 