When People Complain About Walking Far

How perspective can change your reality.

The other day I was talking to a friend who works at both as a nurse, and at milk tea shop part-time.

It made me realize that perspective is a powerful thing.

A bit of perspective can dramatically change our experience. Add up those experiences and over time we have a happier life.

What do you think? How has gratitude played a part in your life?

Leave a comment and let me know, I read and respond to every comment 🙂

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People Who Get Offended Easily

“Those who get offended easily should be offended more often”

Counter-cultural idea: Nobody can offend you, it’s your choice to be offended. When we get offended easily, it’s a sign that we’re either taking something personally or taking things too seriously.

I have to remind myself that when someone says something “offensive” to me or about me, it reveals more about them and their faults rather than myself.

A perfect example: check out the comments section on my original Facebook post. Someone who saw my video got offended by what I was saying and took it down a different rabbit hole.

He interpreted it as being complacent when there is an injustice happening (such as bigotry, racism, etc). This was definitely NOT the spirit or intention of the video.

In my observation, he was noticeably annoyed by the idea and was probably looking to start a fight and demonstrate his intellectual prowess and moral high ground. He also tagged his friend for backup, which seemed to be intended to try and “win” this argument.

While it would have been easy for me to take it personally and attack back, I rewatched my video and took my own advice. I understood where he was coming from, and even though he diverged from the spirit of the idea, I knew this wasn’t a battle I needed to try and “win”.

Instead, I chose to end the discussion with acceptanceempathy, and gratitude for him and his beliefs.

To be completely honest, when I first started reading the thread and the attacks, my heart rate increased as an involuntary “fight or flight” reaction took place in my mind/body. However, I took a second to listen, understand, and calmly formulate my best response.

And in retrospect, I thought it was ironic and hilarious that someone got offended by my video about not getting offended and how you control your own emotional response to things.

We should learn from those who can laugh at themselves easily and not take things personally. These people are almost always much happier.

Even for me, this is a work in progress. And this was such a beautifully-timed challenge for me to face and apply my own advice.

Let me know your thoughts! Do you agree? Disagree?

Originally posted on 7/26/18 on Facebook here.

A Year in Review: 2016

2016, what a fantastic year 😎

Thank you and goodbye, 2016

With 2016 wrapped up and 2017 already well on its way, I figured I should do a recap of the past year. For my friends and family, this is a good opportunity to share what I’ve been up to the past year. Aside from my occasional social media updates, I haven’t been too active in many of my social groups from college. I realized that this is normal when you transition into the “adult” world. On the flip side, I’ve also discovered that with true friends, it’ll feel like time hasn’t passed when you meet up with them after a while.

It’s good to periodically look back to see how far you’ve come, review/reflect, and use what you’ve learned to improve your results going forward.

Continue reading “A Year in Review: 2016”

Piece of Advice: “Attitude of Gratitude”

A Piece of Advice – Discovery Challenge

“This week’s challenge brings out the positive: tell us about a piece of advice you’ve received — and would like to share with others.”

One story immediately comes to mind:

A friend of mine, let’s call him John, told me how the CEO (aka Bossman) of his company rules with an iron fist. He’s the guy who puts the fear of God into people when they mess up. He’s pretty ruthless with calling out your shortcomings when you produce low quality work.

His boss once told him that the best place to be is not in his office. Meaning if someone is called into his office and his door is closed, it’s almost guaranteed that he’s tearing them a new one.

You would think people would dread coming to everyday. He says his workplace has a high turnover rate.

On the contrary, however, many of the people who don’t quit or get fired immediately love coming to work. The environment is fun, everyone has a good attitude, people are constantly challenge with their workload and forced to grow. Aside from the occasional meetings the Bossman will have with teams that aren’t performing, there’s a general consensus that his management style is an effective way to keep people on their toes and productive.

One time, John finds himself in the Bossman’s office. He recently got promoted into a new position and was having difficulty keeping up with the workload. He made a few minor mistakes, which was understandable considering he’s never done this type of work before.

He goes into Bossman’s office, closes the door, and takes a seat at his huge, glass desk. Bossman starts laying it in, point out all of his errors, belittling his work and saying he doesn’t have a brain and yelling at him about how it should be done.

The entire time, John starts to feel humiliated, insecure, frustrated at himself, angry at Bossman for yelling at him, and stressed out about the whole situation. I mean, who wants to be yelled at?

While he’s being yelled at, he just takes it all in silence. Why argue with a guy like this? It won’t make a difference whatever he tries to say. Guys like his boss will always think they’re right no matter what they say. The smart thing to do, he thought, was just to take it.

At the end of the roast, while his ego is at an all time low, his boss asks, “do you have anything to say?”

What should he do? Be defensive? Say how he feels disrespected by the way he was treated? Mention how he could have been nicer in his reproach? Blame someone else?

“Thank you. You’re right and I’ll take what you said, apply it, and improve so those mistakes won’t happen again” John says.

An attitude of gratitude, he thought.

He told me that he had learned when all else fails, putting on an attitude of gratitude is key.

Think about it, it changes your mindset so that you can reframe it from a negative experience to a positive, learning experience. In turn, you will react and respond to the event in a totally different way.

Instead of interpreting his boss reprimanding him as a sign of failure, he saw it as an opportunity to learn from his boss’s feedback, improve, and become better. And he was grateful for his boss calling him out because a boss who didn’t care wouldn’t even take the time to teach him a lesson.

From that point forward, John raised his standards for himself and consistently produced high-quality work. Half out of fear of being yelled at by Bossman, but half because of the satisfaction he gets from knowing he’s constantly growing and becoming better at his craft.

“At my workplace,” John says, “the high volume and steep learning curve will weed out the ones who can’t hang. But the ones who stay tend to produce at such a higher level than they ever thought they were capable of.”

But this wouldn’t be possible, I presume, if people aren’t able to have the right attitude.